The Million-Dollar Question

imageBeing associated to a public figure has its ups and downs. Being a brother to one has more. This entry is the answer to most of your questions that I am willing to share, to share no more.

I’ve been thrown a lot of related questions but that one line bowls me over and for almost a decade now, I still do not know what to answer to… “Bakit ikaw, hindi mag-artista?” (In english- why don’t you also become an actor?)

While it is fun, has lots of perks, and sharing the attention isn’t so bad. There are people who are just giddy about this fact and I dont’t want to take this away from them but at the same time, some can’t hold their excitement that my personal space has been invaded time and again.

If your brainwave is short, reading this might get you thinking I have low self-esteem or bitterness or just plain ranting. Please. I’ve gone through a lot to still experience that. For the life of me, I really do not like explaining it and neither do I want to discuss it for a million reasons but let me explain some…

1. It is an awkward disposition. If I did say I wanted to and didn’t get to become one, does it make me less or more of a person? Believe me, I’ve tried. If you’ve known me since college, you’d know how much I’ve tried. Also, admitting that I’d like to be in showbiz may make me seem like I am worthy of it. Some don’t think so…If I did deserve to be in showbiz, I probably would’ve been in it with the opportunities that I had. Which brings me to my next point…

2. I’ve been through different channels and I’ve had no support. Maybe because of some reasons I gave in #1. And again, believe me, I am not looking down on myself or have low confidence and shit. If things aren’t for you, it just isnt. I’ve been on radio, TV commercials, even on TV shows, but none of it was enough to get noticed. You need the right connections and exposure to get there. Apparently, I don’t.

3. The camera adds 10lbs. You know that sounds cliché and overused? No it’s not. When you see these actors on TV, you’d think their body is just the right proportion. They are actually smaller, or fitter or slimmer in person. Same effect to the fat ones, they are probably exactly or more than how they appear. In print, you can be photoshopped. Unless your makeup artist is also a sorcerer, that’s not gonna help you in front of the camera. Point is, I was chubby back then (probably even now) and my chemistry with the camera never took off.

4. It just doesnt work that way. You may have seen dynasties of showbiz family and how big actors can easily bring in their siblings or children into the glam world of showbiz. Not unless a prominent public figure completely surrender themselves and their privacy to the public, it is unlikely to happen. Not because your brother is an actor, you can have the same opportunity.

5. We (reader and I) might just not be that close for me to explain all this, and that is self-explanatory. You may settle for the reasons stated above. Should I have shared more, then it means I trust you with the details of my life and you are a good friend.

Do not get me wrong. I normally laugh about this and this “Million-Dollar Question” is something I get asked 2-3x average in a week and have been used to this. I’m not someone special to get this type of attention. I just feel like I have to make people understand that it’s not such a big deal compared to how they percieve the situation. Again, I don’t want to take it away from them but some just cross the line.

the reality of my everyday life: I commute on a daily basis, meaning I dont own a car. I rarely get to buy my own clothes. I get a P40 haircut and apply my own hair treatment. I don’t have the capacity to buy luxury items. I don’t get facials and neither do I have credits for an expensive fitness center. I have a good-paying job that pays the bills but is barely relevant to get noticed anywhere. I work on credits to feed my family and children. I am thankful for hand-me-down clothes and shoes from my brother. Other stuff I get to enjoy are sponsored or won sonewhere. I don’t dine out in fancy restaurants unless I get invited to it nor do I spend to get drunk in expensive bars. My latest iPhone was bought by my mom as a birthday gift but paid for half of it in installments. I am a normal guy trying to get by every day just like the rest of us as opposed to contrary belief, associated to a family name. Regardless of how much anyone earns, they are not obligated to provide luxury to anyone else. It is up to their generosity and good heart that they even share what they have, and care enough to make the ones they care for comfortable and help them live in comfort.

May I add how totally rude I find this (again) usual dialogue:

Person: where’s your car?

Me: I dont own one

Person: Really? Isn’t your brother an actor? Why doesnt he buy you one?

Me: (at this point, I normally just shrug or try to walk out of the conversation or answer in all honesty) why should be obligated to buy me one?

Person: because you’re his older brother

Me: all the more he should get me one. I could and should afford my own.

Person: (still doesnt get it up to this point)

I can’t understand why this is hard to understand? Anyway, bottomline is the Million-Dollar questions has a simple answer, things are just meant to be. Any more or any less is what God has for you and either you be contented with it or you go get yours.

For those who have celebrity friends or friends to celebrity siblings or affiliation, you get this. For those who don’t have any, please understand the person at the other end of your questions.

Whew…that quickly turned into a rant blog but I guess it’s best to educate.

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