…oh but it is…
I’ve seen a lot of post on Facebook lately touching on the topic “Where did all the good men go…” which got me thinking, these women have no clue that their answer to that does not come with a box of requirements. Fact of the matter is that these women are probably too busy looking when they also don’t have a clue what they are searching for. Keyword: clueless.
Most women with strong personalities know what they want, what type of man they are on the lookout for. If the men they prefer are somewhat like them, then they are probably in the right place to search, then again there are some who scream “scarcity!” in that department.
Just to fully relate specifically on circumstances I’ve stumbled upon, women who have failed relationships over and over are the ones who actually say this. They are victims of unrequited love or sometimes taken for granted or the like. They often get attracted to men who “need help” or for better lack of words, losers. As part of the male species, I feel shame for my fellow-man who are in a relationship but not on top of it. Chivalry is not dead, it is just absent in selected few. Going back, the men who creates a total imbalance in the relationship is the reason women think there’s scarcity. There are a lot of sausages but few are really franks. Women, (and this can be totally applied vice versa as well) being more emotionally affectionate have what I call the “Evangelist-Savior Complex”. It’s not a medical (psychological) term and I just made it up but for discussion, here’s what it is:
It is the perpetual attraction to someone who needs help or is attractive because of his/her weaknesses. This person has the insatiable desire to be the one to make the other finally happy or successful. This challenges them and continually motivates them.
These women/men will later regret since their chosen partner has weaker will than them. Then the “where did all the good men go..” line becomes tomorrows headline again.
One truth is, good men and women want to settle down because they are high achievers, the go-getters and you will find them in places that have good vibes and where education and self-development takes place, travelling, the office (or busy working), some are mostly at home resting or kicking back with something that makes them even better people. Some express themselves in different ways, you’ll find them immersed in arts, music, sports…I’m not saying good guys that are not in these that I’ve mentioned are not great. Then again, when you ask women/men what their hearts say, you’ll notice a pattern and it does fall in the same space of what I just mentioned.
When women/men want to distract themselves, they go to places where getting into ones personal bubble is fairly easy, getting to know at the 2nd level is not always required and this is NOT just about bars and clubs. Think about it.
A friend also commented on a post that good men that are hard to find are all over the religious groups. The opposite sex sometimes don’t easily get attracted with them since they don’t easily show qualities dictated by media. Not because they are in harmony with their religion means thats all they do. Admit it, you think the naughty stuff is cool to some extent and you want that first before you settle with someone who has already let go of worldly and Godly things.
Lastly, the most common reason they can’t find Mr. Right is the ever popular – “friendzone”. Both men and women will deny ever condemning an opposite sex to the friendzone. Some do this unintentionally but because people have standards never care to look deeper. Do you know why the underdog story is always popular? Because underdogs are hungrier, they are willing to give everything and charge it to experience. The people who have had the most and worst rejections are often the most successful. When the underdogs finally figure it out, they have limitless experience and knowledge at their disposal.
I’m sure there are arguable points here and a lot more reasons but a blog can only handle so much. Feel free to agree, disagree, argue or share your own insights.